March 31st, 2010 by Gui-don't

GuidoFail.com Mailbox

Mailbox time kids. We thank our good friend (name withheld to protect innocent from harm caused by hair gel, self tanner, or flying free weights), uh, John for sending us photos of this real life doucher. Check out THIS motherfucker.

Who has one thumb and loves cock?

Who has one thumb and loves cock? THIS GUY! Apparently he likes to hang out by garbage cans. Actually, it looks like he’s taken cover from the rain. Any idiot knows that rain and guidos are mortal enemies. Rain will make the rub on orange tan, start to streak, and will make their hair go flat. Clearly unacceptable if you’re a guido. And dude, you’re sunglasses are gay. What are you, the fly? Is it dress like Lenny Kravitz day?

Where's all the dudes?

Tri-Lam. Nice. And again, nice choice for eyewear. Kanye West called. He says you are a faggot.

Their Special Day

Ok you lovebirds. What the FUCK is going on here. Do you guys shop at Ross? I don’t know what is bigger, the proud groom’s watch, or the power alleys on our lovely bride. And hey, fuckface, will you please tell your friend in Yellow it’s called “An iron” and it’s NOT expensive.

Classy Move Here...

Hmmm, pajama bottoms? Our hero must be on his way to the strip club for lap dances. Classy move Guido, classy.

GUIDO??? YOU….

funny guido, guido fag, guido fail, lame guido

March 19th, 2010 by Gui-don't

"Fat Bastard" From Austin Powers

Snooki from Jersey Shore

I know we’ve all wondered, “Hmmmmm I wonder what a kid produced from the high mileage loins of Snooki after she’s been sperminated by Fat Bastard (from Austin Powers) would look like”. Well, don’t worry your pretty little gel-spiked head, Guido-maniacs. GuidoFail.com to the rescue to show you EXACTLY what that love child from the bowels of hell would look like. We have seen into the future and found what that dude would look like. And, without further ado….here he is.

First things first: WHERE'S YOUR SHITTER? I've got a turtle-head poking out! Seriously, I've got a CRAP on deck that could choke a DONKEY!

fat bastard, fat guido, fat tan, snooki

March 17th, 2010 by Gui-don't

both of these people are looking for cock..

Here is our poof-a-licous, Jersey Shore scrub, Snooki, whoring it up, partying at some club recently. Would anyone care to wager with me, if we polled US citizens aged 14-35, that more people would know who “Snooki” is, than would know the name of our Vice President of the United States?

“Health Care? FUCK Health Care! We just want to see Snooki get NAKED!”

Epic Facepalm.
But, ok. Now, realize she says the pictures don’t exist…but someone has them, and they’re for sale.

naked snooki, snooki naked, snooki nude, snooki st. patrick's day

March 17th, 2010 by Gui-don't

Please tell me this bitch forgot to take her mud mask off....

Well, as you can see in this picture…there clearly…is….a…UGH EXCUSE ME FOR A SEC……

BLLLARRRGGGHGHHHHHHHHHPPPPPHHHHHHHHHRRRAARRRRRRRRR

Not feeling well. GuidoFail taking the rest of the day off.

epic tan fail, fail tan, garfeld orange, guido tan, horrible guidette, tan fail

March 14th, 2010 by Gui-don't

We have gotten a surprising amount of requests for a banner, or photo, or something people could use to show their friends GuidoFail.com on their website. The art department at GuidoFail.com whipped up this little banner for you to put on your website, put on your facebook, put on your myspace, shove up your ass, whatever you like. Thanks for the requests and support of GuidoFail.com! We’ll keep delivering the douche chills. -Guidon’t

epic guido failure, guido banner, guido fail, guidofail.com, lol guido

March 14th, 2010 by Gui-don't

An' I'ya wanna Punch 'Ya

GuidoFail.com reader Angela, in Portland, sent us some creepy dude bullshit art. Dude’s with double chins and chin strap beards are funny. It’s like the beard is trying as hard as it can to keep the neck fat held back, as it tries to creep up onto the dudes face. Why is this dude bicep curling is wife’s pregnant belly? Who thought this would be a good picture? How does this conversation unfold? “Well, I thought I would get shirtless, full blown nipples and everything, and then bicep curl your belly, showing off my phat tattoo”. Ah yes, the tattoo. We can only guess that “Aniyah” is the name they’ve picked for their child. “Oh Look! We’re gonna be COOL and pick a unique name NO OTHER GIRL has!” Yeah, there is a reason. That’s a shitty name. Aniyah? And-i-uh-think-a-we-founda-nother-guido-fail-a. Thanks Angela in Portland. Douchebag bicep curling his unborn daughter? YOU FUCKING FAIL

aniyah, bad baby name, bad tattoos, bicep tattoo, guido tattoo

March 14th, 2010 by Gui-don't

Does This Shirt Make My Butt Look Big?

Really? Are we still talking about Ed Hardy? Who in the Mother Fuck decided Ed Hardy shit was cool to wear? It’s not. If you are wearing an Ed Hardy ANYTHING, people are laughing at you as soon as you walk by them. This kid would have a better chance at some dignity, ripping this shirt off, Hulk Hogan style, and prancing around cupping his man/boy titties, than rocking this 15XXL Ed Hardy shirt. Hey, fat kid. YOU FAIL.

ed hardy fat guy, ed hardy fat kid, fat ed hardy tshirt, fat kid guido

March 14th, 2010 by Gui-don't

Yo Yo Yo, Imma Let You Finish, But My Pink Hat, Kanye Shades, and Bandana are the Flyest Accessories of ALL TIME

A good friend of GuidoFail’s, Lord Standley, recently started a thread on his facebook page regarding the statistics regarding guys in Ed Hardy shirts. LS says that if you are wearing anything Ed Hardy, 90% of the world thinks you are a douchebag. If you are wearing Kanye Shades at the same time, you have the other 10% against you as well. Sounds like it’s a TERRIBLE day to be this guy featured above. Guido-Ed Hardy-Clown? YOU FUCKING FAIL!

Ed Hardiot, ed hardy, hardy douche, hardy kanye douche, kanye west